Travelling

It takes some getting used to living on two sides of an island. In the ancient past when ancient villagers lived on islands, I'm pretty sure they didn't traverse from one end of the island to the other without good reason. For one its a pain getting from one end to the other, unless your island is the "cartoon" island, the one with one coconut tree and one unlucky marooned guy often depicted in cartoons.

Which reminds me, people like to ask others the question of what'd they'd bring if they were suddenly marooned on a deserted island. People tend to say stuff like the most beautiful lady in the world, a book, an mp3 player or whatever. I can tell you these people are either really stupid or just horny. The first thing I'd bring is a working auto-roaming handphone with GPS. The second would probably be a spare battery for that phone. The third would be another spare battery. You get the idea. Only idiots would choose to actually continue staying on that island. You can't eat coconuts forever, nor would you want to.

Back to the topic of travelling cross-island, as much of a pain as it is travelling around in an MRT, I still have to do it to get home from camp. However last friday the trip home on the MRT proved a little different. While I was daydreaming on the MRT this large extended family came in and sat on the row of seats opposite me. Well, it would have been just another family had it not been for this one little girl with two ponytails who just refused to sit still. One moment she would be climbing the metal pole, and the next moment she'd be hanging by her hands on the overhead handles and swinging around. Sometimes she would look at her own reflection in the wall and shake her head while making monkey faces at herself. Otherwise she would be swopping seats with the rest of her family members. If there ever was a tireless ball of energy I think she would be close to it.

I watched her antics with a sense of amusement and a tinge of sadness. The amusement probably stemmed from the fact that I was getting a free circus show from a very enthusiastic performer who never stopped laughing and smiling. The sadness probably came from the realisation that I was once a little kid like this girl who swung round the poles and ran helter-skelter from end to end of the train, laughing and carefree as I did so.

Somewhere along that line I became more reserved till I wouldn't be caught dead doing what this girl was doing, although there was this part of me that really wanted to play along like this little girl. It seems that as one grows up, one gets robbed out of a very basic need to just have fun. Why does it even seem wrong to enjoy one of life's simplest joys, to do what the heart wants? Its as though that as one grows up, one forgets how to have fun, however much we know about time being money and making pots of it.

The thing I noted about this family was, no matter how much of a "disturbance" this girl was, her parents never once stepped in to stop her, only watching from the sides to make sure she didn't get hurt. The amazing thing was, nobody seemed to mind the girl either, despite the fact that she was definitely quite prominent. The family didn't seem to care whether their face would be lost because of their little girl, like the typical chinese family. To them it was more important that their little girl was happy. And surprisingly, it was the same case for the rest of the occupants in the cabin, although people were giving up their peaceful rides for her. Maybe the occupants were just bochap, but I think there was more than that. It gave me a lot to think about.

The end of my teenage years, on the cusp of adulthood

Reality hits hardest when you don't want to believe it. In my mind I'm still a teenager but with a 2 in front of my age in the tens place I have to accept that I'll never be one again. Not that age has anything to do with one's behaviour. It just isn't true that people get wiser as they get older. They just get older. The wiser part is optional.

Getting back to the topic, seeing that I'm now officially older, I'm supposed to do frightening things like planning, commitment and decisions that I never thought about because it always seems that these were adult stuff. Whew. Before you know it you're already in it. I am actually responsible for "shaping the world in time to come". A huge mouthful and definitely a hyperbole in every sense of the word. I think I'll be quite satisfied if I get through my daily routine without meeting any of the unholy trinity of bootlickers, hypocrites and anals.

I tried to defy my age and go back into time but I find that I am getting more distant with the teenagers of this age. They communicate in intelligible gibberish in their sms-es which I can read but I don't enjoy reading. I can understand them using words like "biatch" because it feels better to call a bitch a "bee-yatch". It has that kick about it.

But when your whole sms is full of words like "hv" "2moro" and "cn" and long abbreviations (an oxymoron) like roflmao and worse examples that I can't recall as of now, it is just tedious. Can you believe they actually summarise Shakespeare into sms langugage in London? Its a good thing he isn't alive anymore as that would be the equivalent of using the canvas of the Mona Lisa as toilet paper. I really think he'd die a second time.

In addition I find that this generation seems to enjoy sleeping around. Well to some teens that might seem like heaven, but I can tell you I'm not really comfortable with it. I think I might be one of the last surviving members of a generation that was taught only how to "window shop" It seems the in thing now is "trying for size".

It must have something to do with rising affluence. Just as people try their clothes for size, now they do the same with their boyfriends and girlfriends. Its all about having more choice isn't it? I guess this generation will have less excuse to claim that they were cheated after "making their choice", in a warped way. However it seems that the returning of "unsatisfactory goods" to the market is also becoming in vogue, when people of the past would just pretend that the clothes they bought actually fit, or try to cut them down to size. Well, I guess its all in the package.

Trying to act older than I actually am doesn't work either. The people older than me all seem like they have seen better days. I don't think I want to go down that very weathered and depressing path. It has an effect on your quality of life. In any case, I'll rather be younger than older, because I'm just not ready to do adult stuff like commitment, planning and decisions. Oh who am I kidding. I should try my best not to end up anal, bootlicking or hypocritical.

So while I mull over this topic, I shall do the thing NSFs do best. Slacking.

Poisonball.

Life is a bitch. Just when you thought that the good days have come, life always finds a way to shake up that comfortable reality and tear it apart.

The National Day Parade is an annual event that chokes people up with fervent patroitism. Unfortunately, when it comes to becoming part of that parade, no one is anywhere near that keen. People don't really love Singapore that much when it isn't 9 august. The fact that participation in the parade means no weekends off for 3 months and endless afternoons frying under the sun on cow manure doesn't help either.

Unfortunately, the marching robots have to come from somewhere. In this case, my company was only too honoured to accept. When my company accepts shit, the shit hits the fan, and next thing you know my platoon is always somewhere in that mess. As part of the company, I admit that we should contribute. There's only one major problem. Only one unlucky guy is needed.

Can you imagine the situation? Its like a game of poison ball. Nobody wants the poison, and once they get it they just throw it across the room and into the arms of their best friend. Claws start coming out, and next thing you know everyone is only too happy to do their bunkmates in. And they say that the army forges lifelong friendships. All you need is something like this and immediately all friendships are negated, as long as you aren't THE ONE.

My platoon spent two hours in a room drawing lots, bickering over the results, and in the end getting a guy with a knee problem to be THE ONE. I'm pretty sure this is not the end of the situation, because they will quickly realise that he's unsuitable. A few more such episodes and I'm pretty sure that we'll have trouble sleeping in the same room.

Here's the second episode. At 12 midnight, when everyone was getting ready to sleep, we suddenly received news of a turnout. Its ok for me because I sleep late anyway, but only too bad for those guys with guard duty the next day. 7 hours of sleep? Stupid hypocritical organisation. But that wasn't the main beef. The main beef came after the turnout, when my platoon and another platoon were drawn aside, and informed that someone lost something really valuable.

In no uncertain terms, we were told that if someone really took it, he should quietly "have a conscience", turn the item over and the matter would be closed. Indirectly, I inferred that he was referring to us. When there are two platoons in one company and they aren't on good terms, any misfortune one has is immediately attributed to the other. But to be honest, any guy who is careless enough to leave something valuable unguarded for the time span of a WHOLE DAY can only blame himself for his loss. If someone was willing to risk stealing it, why would he return it? Sadly, it seems that with a potential thief in our midst, life can only get worse till we catch that little rat.

It sure ain't easy being green. Its great to be out.

Counting down to my ORD

A long time ago when I was a nice little kid, my parents used to tell me that when you go to school you must study hard, get into a good school, get a good job, and make your mark in society. Then I went into the army.

Just what am I getting at? I'm just hinting that perhaps somewhere along that line parents should tell their little boys the truth. Little boys will study hard, get into a good school, join the army, become servile and brainless, come out, and end up in a dead end job doing all the work while their bosses scratch their butt cracks and flirt with the secretary.

But that's a reality too scary to entertain isn't it? No parent would ever want to lie to their children, but sometimes they need to protect their young ones. Not that the reality hits them any less hard when it does.

I always thought that school sucked, that there was too much to study, too little sleep and teachers from hell. Now I have nothing to study, too much sleep, but I'm really in hell. The irony isn't lost on me.

I actually want to do tutorials. I think JC students the country over would whack me with their thick stacks of undone tutorials. (I was a JC student once, a normal one who never finished all their tutorials)

But I would get the last laugh when these idiots get their turn and replace this one sad little sucker. Hahaha. It will sure be a long laugh. Two years running to be exact. But until then, its one more day and another day after that till I see that pink card again.

The opposition rally.

Yesterday I went to an opposition rally at Choa Chu Kang. Yes there is such a thing as an opposition in Singapore, as unbelievable as it sounds.

I was there because I was seriously bored with nothing better to do along with 4 other people from my platoon. It seems that rallies are the in thing these days, with everyone attending rallies everywhere from Ang Mo Kio to Tampines.

The first thing I noticed about the rally was how many people there were. With almost no opposition MPs in parliament, the last thing you'd expect for the opposition is support. However, it seems that there is plenty of it, just that the votes don't reflect it. That same uncle you see shouting himself hoarse with opposition slogans could be that very same uncle who crosses the box for the white-clad lightning gods come May 6.

Oh well, this is Singapore. We aren't exactly known for wearing our hearts on our sleeves, or anywhere else for that matter. The only time when you see Singaporeans show any signs of passion would be at that sale down the road, after the 4D results, or when you suddenly get a few hundred dollars in your bank near elections.

The rally wasn't actually anything much, but it was quite interesting observing the people at the rallies. Everytime something that wasn't politically correct came out, everyone would go like "Yeah!". I just wished that there would be more of such stuff, but I don't want to see more people in jail or bankrupted. I was also quite interested on how the media would twist the stuff I heard to make it appear different in the news. I was disappointed on that aspect though, as the media actually reported the rally quite accurately. They must be commended. It must have been very difficult doing that.

As a matter of fact, I've stopped reading the papers these few days because its seriously so chock full of election propaganda and other bullshit that I don't want to read anymore lest I get a serious case of depression if all the stuff being promised doesn't actually materialise. And what's with the Gomez issue anyway? Is any more ink and paper wasted on Mr. Gomez going to feed me for the next 5 years? I'm more interested in how much more they're going to raise bus fares, not whether some guy was trying to "wayang".

I find it even more hilarious that our PM claims we need a first world opposition, then turns tail a few days later and says that more opposition MPs make it difficult for him in parliament. So do you want an opposition or not? Will the presence of a few less yes-men make you unable to work? I thought a PM of all people should be more capable than that. Do you see Tony Blair complaning that he doesn't have 95% of the seats in parliament? I don't think so.