Poisonball.

Life is a bitch. Just when you thought that the good days have come, life always finds a way to shake up that comfortable reality and tear it apart.

The National Day Parade is an annual event that chokes people up with fervent patroitism. Unfortunately, when it comes to becoming part of that parade, no one is anywhere near that keen. People don't really love Singapore that much when it isn't 9 august. The fact that participation in the parade means no weekends off for 3 months and endless afternoons frying under the sun on cow manure doesn't help either.

Unfortunately, the marching robots have to come from somewhere. In this case, my company was only too honoured to accept. When my company accepts shit, the shit hits the fan, and next thing you know my platoon is always somewhere in that mess. As part of the company, I admit that we should contribute. There's only one major problem. Only one unlucky guy is needed.

Can you imagine the situation? Its like a game of poison ball. Nobody wants the poison, and once they get it they just throw it across the room and into the arms of their best friend. Claws start coming out, and next thing you know everyone is only too happy to do their bunkmates in. And they say that the army forges lifelong friendships. All you need is something like this and immediately all friendships are negated, as long as you aren't THE ONE.

My platoon spent two hours in a room drawing lots, bickering over the results, and in the end getting a guy with a knee problem to be THE ONE. I'm pretty sure this is not the end of the situation, because they will quickly realise that he's unsuitable. A few more such episodes and I'm pretty sure that we'll have trouble sleeping in the same room.

Here's the second episode. At 12 midnight, when everyone was getting ready to sleep, we suddenly received news of a turnout. Its ok for me because I sleep late anyway, but only too bad for those guys with guard duty the next day. 7 hours of sleep? Stupid hypocritical organisation. But that wasn't the main beef. The main beef came after the turnout, when my platoon and another platoon were drawn aside, and informed that someone lost something really valuable.

In no uncertain terms, we were told that if someone really took it, he should quietly "have a conscience", turn the item over and the matter would be closed. Indirectly, I inferred that he was referring to us. When there are two platoons in one company and they aren't on good terms, any misfortune one has is immediately attributed to the other. But to be honest, any guy who is careless enough to leave something valuable unguarded for the time span of a WHOLE DAY can only blame himself for his loss. If someone was willing to risk stealing it, why would he return it? Sadly, it seems that with a potential thief in our midst, life can only get worse till we catch that little rat.

It sure ain't easy being green. Its great to be out.

Counting down to my ORD

A long time ago when I was a nice little kid, my parents used to tell me that when you go to school you must study hard, get into a good school, get a good job, and make your mark in society. Then I went into the army.

Just what am I getting at? I'm just hinting that perhaps somewhere along that line parents should tell their little boys the truth. Little boys will study hard, get into a good school, join the army, become servile and brainless, come out, and end up in a dead end job doing all the work while their bosses scratch their butt cracks and flirt with the secretary.

But that's a reality too scary to entertain isn't it? No parent would ever want to lie to their children, but sometimes they need to protect their young ones. Not that the reality hits them any less hard when it does.

I always thought that school sucked, that there was too much to study, too little sleep and teachers from hell. Now I have nothing to study, too much sleep, but I'm really in hell. The irony isn't lost on me.

I actually want to do tutorials. I think JC students the country over would whack me with their thick stacks of undone tutorials. (I was a JC student once, a normal one who never finished all their tutorials)

But I would get the last laugh when these idiots get their turn and replace this one sad little sucker. Hahaha. It will sure be a long laugh. Two years running to be exact. But until then, its one more day and another day after that till I see that pink card again.

The opposition rally.

Yesterday I went to an opposition rally at Choa Chu Kang. Yes there is such a thing as an opposition in Singapore, as unbelievable as it sounds.

I was there because I was seriously bored with nothing better to do along with 4 other people from my platoon. It seems that rallies are the in thing these days, with everyone attending rallies everywhere from Ang Mo Kio to Tampines.

The first thing I noticed about the rally was how many people there were. With almost no opposition MPs in parliament, the last thing you'd expect for the opposition is support. However, it seems that there is plenty of it, just that the votes don't reflect it. That same uncle you see shouting himself hoarse with opposition slogans could be that very same uncle who crosses the box for the white-clad lightning gods come May 6.

Oh well, this is Singapore. We aren't exactly known for wearing our hearts on our sleeves, or anywhere else for that matter. The only time when you see Singaporeans show any signs of passion would be at that sale down the road, after the 4D results, or when you suddenly get a few hundred dollars in your bank near elections.

The rally wasn't actually anything much, but it was quite interesting observing the people at the rallies. Everytime something that wasn't politically correct came out, everyone would go like "Yeah!". I just wished that there would be more of such stuff, but I don't want to see more people in jail or bankrupted. I was also quite interested on how the media would twist the stuff I heard to make it appear different in the news. I was disappointed on that aspect though, as the media actually reported the rally quite accurately. They must be commended. It must have been very difficult doing that.

As a matter of fact, I've stopped reading the papers these few days because its seriously so chock full of election propaganda and other bullshit that I don't want to read anymore lest I get a serious case of depression if all the stuff being promised doesn't actually materialise. And what's with the Gomez issue anyway? Is any more ink and paper wasted on Mr. Gomez going to feed me for the next 5 years? I'm more interested in how much more they're going to raise bus fares, not whether some guy was trying to "wayang".

I find it even more hilarious that our PM claims we need a first world opposition, then turns tail a few days later and says that more opposition MPs make it difficult for him in parliament. So do you want an opposition or not? Will the presence of a few less yes-men make you unable to work? I thought a PM of all people should be more capable than that. Do you see Tony Blair complaning that he doesn't have 95% of the seats in parliament? I don't think so.