Saturday, February 16, 2008

Homophobia


A few days back at the NIE canteen, some of us were speculating whether someone we knew was gay. And then this question popped up. Would you view someone differently if he was actually a closet gay, and he came out in the open?

So I did a little experiment of my own. I'm sure everyone has heard of Savage Garden. When I first knew this band, I was just a little primary school kid and I totally loved them because I thought their songs were fantastic. No arguments allowed. They were. But, they have since split and something has happened to the frontman Darren Hayes. So I decided to watch their video "I knew I loved you". The last time I watched this was before he started batting for the other side.

And I have to admit that when I watched it with this new information in my mind, I somehow couldn't take him seriously throughout the whole song. The way he was looking at Kirsten Dunst, yes that's her by the way, somehow it just didn't have the same effect knowing that he doesn't go for females. And when I see him now, I would be like how come I couldn't see that he was going to be gay before? Weren't there so many obvious hints, like his style of singing, the way he dresses etc.

And this line from the song Affirmation "I believe you can control or choose your sexuality." Gosh, it couldn't have been more obvious now that I have the benefit of hindsight.

Now, when they show shots of him looking at the screen, I kinda feel freaked. I think its a guy thing. We all have like a form of homophobia, because we have no idea how to react when another guy wants to get too close. Cue Brokeback. While the cowboys in Brokeback were more accepting of it, even going all the way, I would never tolerate the same situation in my life. Ever.

I assume its because they were cowboys, didn't know better, and the only alternative they had up in the hills were donkeys and cows. Donkey, cow or human (male). All shitty choices, but animal is just way out.

And I mean it when I say I can't even imagine it happening in my life. Not even if the "right" guy comes along, if you want to put it in a funny way that is really kinda unfunny.

I think for guys, it really affects you when someone you know suddenly becomes gay. Even if you were the best of friends or good brothers before, you will never be as close again. It's because we are really afraid.

Although I am very aware that gays have their own preferences in males too, something we tend to forget when we shun gays, the fact that there is this possibility is just too much for any straight male to handle.

Anyway, watching this video made me look up all my old Savage Garden favourites. With one big difference. This time, it was a pure listening experience. I decided not to watch the videos lest I develop a different view of them. Some things are better left unchanged.

Friday, February 15, 2008

Terrorist interview

Ooh! You think you're so good! Look at me! I don't need subtitles! LOL!

A belated post on Valentine's

Valentine's day. The 14th of February.

My personal take on it is that it was created by females (and maybe some gay men) to strike dread in the hearts of males worldwide. On this day, and the days leading up to it, males are subjected to immense stress, and on the day itself, their worth as boyfriends are judged.

Most guys don't get what romantic is. It's really a creation of females who want the impossible. However, we have but one option, and that is to pretend we get it.

Every year, there are 3 big hazards for those with girlfriends. The 3 big hazards are, V Day, Christmas, and... her birthday. Somebody save you if you forget the last one, unless you are a gay man.

Here's why V Day is a problem. On any other day, appreciation for your better half is appreciated. On this day, it is EXPECTED. You know how crappy that is? I have to say something nice about you because its V Day and that's what people do on V Day. I have to buy flowers and choose a nice place for dinner. On top of that, I have to behave like the gentleman I'm not. Here's a piece of advice to females. On V Day, you see the best side of a guy, if he has any. If on V Day he's an utter piece of shit, he ain't gonna get any better.

Then there is this thing about peer pressure. The reason why everyone behaves differently on V Day is because the whole world around you changes. Everybody starts selling flowers and chocolates. Everybody starts talking about it, and there is this buzz that is entirely man-made (ok maybe woman-made). If no one gave a shit about V Day, it wouldn't matter. But people want to, and as a result, happiness.

Suddenly you see hearts everywhere, and pictures of happy couples, and jewellery... and anchovies, and orang utans, and breakfast cereal... Sorry I sidetracked a little there, but you get the point.

There is also this thing about how everything is interpreted differently on V Day. On V Day, do not go to town alone. Don't say I didn't warn you. You will be interpreted as sad, lonely, unwanted, or just gay. You have to go out as a couple on V Day. An ornament on one's arm of the opposite gender is a necessary accessory to avoid being judged as a freak. Is it any wonder that the available shun going outdoors like their lives depend on it when V Day comes?

However, V Day is also Friendship day. And it is probably a good time as any to tell or show your friends how much you appreciate them. You can tell them that on a daily basis and they'll probably think you're joking, or just gay. But if you do it on this day, you can say it's because it's friendship day. Then you can get free drinks or gifts because people feel happy being appreciated. Ok maybe that's stretching it a little but yeah, Friendship day ain't too bad.