Last night, after returning from round island supper, I was actually in a fluster because it was 1am and I hadn't even started on my 205 aesop fables presentation, which was due in less than 12 hours. I was feeling sleepy and a little nutty from too much prata and laksa, so guess what came out. From the brain! What were you thinking!
This was written in the style of an Aesop fable, but it became so crazy even the lecturer Paul Falzon thought so.
The apple story. A result of Apple envy. Yes all you darned Apple users.
In a small town a long time ago, there was a little shophouse. On the first level, there was a greengrocer, who sold apples. On the second floor, there was a doctor who owned an Apple macbook. It was sleek and white, and the envy of the greengrocer. Everyday, the greengrocer would look at his round green apples, then look at the doctor's sleek white Apple, and feel the envy growing inside.
What few knew however, was the fact that this doctor was extremely dishonest. He had actually majored in English, not medicine. Everyday, he would buy a few apples from the greengrocer, then prescribe them to his patients, telling them that "an apple a day keeps the doctor away".
Since he was a doctor and his patients were rural countryside folk, they believed him and ate the apples, and would emerge a few days later miraculously cured because apples were very nutritious, full of vitamins, minerals and fibre.
With the ridiculous amount of money the doctor was making from his apple scam, he soon bought himself an Apple. The greengrocer, green with envy, decided one day to steal the Apple. The greengrocer waited till the doctor was on his way to buy apples, then he sneaked into the doctor's office and picked up the Apple.
What he did not realise however, not being very intelligent, was that the doctor, finding no greengrocer selling apples, soon returned to his office. The greengrocer, in a panic, threw the Apple out of the window, and it hit the head of a certain Sir Issac Newton who was passing by. The doctor, finding his Apple missing, accused the greengrocer of stealing it and hauled him to court.
In court, the doctor and greengrocer argued their cases. The doctor accused the greengrocer of Apple theft, but the greengrocer denied having ever seen the Apple. In the end, the judge Sir Issac Newton delivered his verdict.
"I do not believe that you, the doctor ever had an Apple, and I believe that you, the greengrocer has seen some apples in your time. Therefore you are both lying. But I do now, however, have an Apple (evil cackling laughter) and I have discovered the law of gravity."
Moral of the story: The dishonest get no credit for being honest. And Newton discovered the law of gravity.