It is really quite ridiculous when a library as big as Woodlands REGIONAL library (note the "regional" because I put it there for special emphasis), all 4 floors of it, can have insufficient space for one person with a laptop on a Friday afternoon. But that was precisely what happened.
It's Friday for goodness sakes. Stop mugging and go and do weekend stuff you twats. And if you want to mug, don't hog my power points because you don't need electricity to mug. Darned hogs. Pigs. Sows. Swine. Char siew bao.
Anyway, I was there today to waste time. Don't ask me why I always have time to waste. I just do and if you don't, I'm sorry but I can't sell you mine. Although I certainly would sell some if I could to wealthy old and dying billionaires who want to have wild hedonistic fun with twentysomething bunnies, with the help of a few blue vitamin V pills. Va va vroom.
But yes back to the main topic, I was extremely shocked at how people appeared to have colonised all corners of the library. It was so bad that every time I found an obscure corner behind a shelf that I thought no one would notice, I would turn the corner of the shelf to see 5 smiling faces looking back at me.
There was no such thing as an empty seat, despite the library having plenty of sitting room. People were everywhere across all 4 floors - On the seats, on the floors between the shelves, spread across the floor in every possible corner, in all the toilet cubicles (which was pretty darned amazing), and behind the library counters. Well the last group have no choice because they work there but since they're people I'll just throw them in.
So after much effort and walking around in frustration I finally found a corner in the children's section, chasing some little kids away to get my space. I ended up in a corner named "Captain Green and his forest adventure", filled with pictures of a smiley frog. Frogs are pretty disgusting creatures but this one was particularly so, because it had fingers on each hand like a lizard. Just like the Courtesy Lion. Which part of that looks like a lion to you? Yeah I know, the colour.
Anyway, this is really funny. Do you know why the frog is called Captain Green? Its because he is trying to save his hungry friend, Billy the Bin! Apparently, his home is being destroyed by rubbish, so to save his home, he feeds the very same rubbish to his friend.
Gee, what an elegant solution. That's what friends are for.